A voice at 2:14 asks for Phoebe, and the friends trace a stranger's collection — a menu, a hand, a tune, a mug — to their own table before leaving the lamp on for him.
Ross
Source(capping the pen, writing the header) S01/E13 closed at fifty-one — one card, one key, one fridge. S01/E14: "The One With the Call for Phoebe." There's a man on speaker asking for Phoebe, and a new card on the step for tomorrow night.
Phoebe
Source(taking the phone, mouthing "who is it?" at Rachel) This is Phoebe. (a long pause; then, quietly) Guys — he says he's the one who borrowed my hand. (beat) And he wants it back tomorrow at two-fourteen.
Monica
Source(apron twisted in one fist, phone on speaker between them) Two bowls, one ironed tablecloth, and he asks for the singer. (beat) Phoebs, answer it in here, where I can watch your face.
Joey
Source(phone to his ear, doing a low voice) Yeah, this is Phoebe. Talk. (beat) (off the phone, to the room) He knew my name. How does the two-fourteen guy know my name?
Rachel
Source(lifting the new card next to the receiver, gesturing at Phoebe) He knows your name, so make him earn the handwriting. (beat) Ask what's printed on tomorrow's card — if he wrote it, he'll read it.
Monica
Source(crossing one line out of the reservation book, rewriting it, pressing hard) Wrong number on my last ticket — corrected. (beat) Now ask him, Phoebs. I've got a pot on and no patience.
Joey
Source(both hands up, then pointing at the back door) How do you borrow a hand? (beat) Tomorrow I'm on that door — this time I lock it from the outside. He wants a hand, he can knock.
Chandler
Source(leaning at the speaker, arms folded) You knew Joey's name — good for you. Now hum the tune. (beat) Ross has a whole tin riding on it, and I hate being the only one in the dark.
Phoebe
Source(prying the phone from Joey) You can't be me — I booked this voice first. (into phone, sweetly) Hi. What's my name? ...Uh-huh. And the card tomorrow — read it to me.
Ross
Source(trading the pen for the phone) Chan, we retired the tune — it was the fridge. (beat) New test: ask him where he files a card. Before A or after — only the stranger says before.
Rachel
Source(snapping her fingers, pacing one step) Wait — twenty past two, one table, never ordered, paid in quarters. (beat) Phoebs, ask him: does he still pay exact change?
Joey
Source(hanging over Phoebe's shoulder, at the phone) Ask him who the second bowl's for. (beat) Table for two: one guy, one singer — so where exactly do I sit?
Monica
Source(snagging the receiver from Ross, mouth close to the speaker) My box, my rules. Before A or after? (a pause; she holds the phone out like a wet rag) ...He said before. Nothing's ever said before.
Joey
Source(holding up a hand for quiet) Nobody sits at a table twice and never orders. (beat) Ask him what he's having, Phoebs. If he says nothing, don't go.
Chandler
Source(taking the receiver back, flat) So I interrogated a dairy case for nothing, and Mon got a confession off a phone. (beat) Before A means he wanted us to see it first. He's not sneaking in, he's knocking.
Ross
Source(one finger up, vindicated) Before A — and the front of the box isn't a misfile, it's a message. (beat) He wanted that card found.
Phoebe
Source(trading the receiver for the new card) Fine, my turn. Why my hand? (a long pause) ...Hmm. (turning the card over) Guys — there's a song on the back. Four lines, my handwriting, no title.
Joey
Source(one finger up, remembering) Hang on. Tuesday, two-fourteen — there was a guy by the coat rack. (beat) I said hey, he didn't move, so I figured he was a coat.
Rachel
Source(turning the card over once more) He knows all six of us and wants to be found. (beat) Fine — tomorrow I'm wearing the good boots. If he's asking to join, he should see what he's joining.
Ross
Source(grabbing Joey's shoulders) Joe. The coat. Did it have a face? (beat) Close your eyes — you're three feet from it, and it's two-fourteen.
Joey
Source(eyes shut, straining) Tall, beige coat, holding a menu — and I remember the corner was ripped. (beat) That's all I've got. Coats don't have faces.
Monica
Source(reading over Phoebe's shoulder, humming two notes low, then stopping) Phoebs — that's my mom's part. Off the diner radio. (beat) So who's been carrying my mother's song around?
Rachel
Source(hand over her mouth, then pointing at Joey) That's my station's menu, with my ripped corner. I write your names on the backs — "Joe's sub," "Mon's muffin." (beat) He didn't borrow your name, Joe. I gave it to him.
Ross
Source(pointing at Joey, then at the card) Tall, beige coat, holding a menu, corner ripped. (beat) Joe, you didn't see a coat — you saw the two-fourteen card.
Joey
Source(squinting at the back of the card) So the guy studied our names off a menu. That's not a date, that's homework. (beat) For that, he's buying soup.
Chandler
Source(laying the torn menu beside the card, evidence-style) Menu from Rach, hand from Phoebs, tune from Mrs. Geller — he's not stealing from us, he's collecting. (beat) So either we've got a fan, or somebody's got a hobby.
Phoebe
Source(singing the card, one finger keeping time) "Two at two-fourteen / one plate, one tune / leave the light on, love / I'll be there soon." (beat) Mon — those are new words over your mom's melody.
Joey
Source(thumb at the counter lamp) "Leave the light on" — that lamp was on Tuesday night. (beat) So he was already in here, reading a menu under our lamp, waiting.
Monica
Source(squaring the two bowls, then stopping, hand flat on the second) "One plate." He wrote one plate — I set two bowls. (beat) So somebody at that table tomorrow isn't eating.
Rachel
Source(pulling the second bowl back toward her own seat) One plate, one person eating — and I'm the one here until two. (beat) He's already watched me eat a muffin, Mon. That's basically our second date.
Phoebe
Source(ticking off fingers) One menu, one hand, one diner tune. (beat) That's three of us. Ross, Chan — what are you two hiding that a collector would want?
Joey
Source(spinning the bowl back to his side) One plate, one chair, and I already called the chair. (beat) Rach can have the candle.
Monica
Source(sliding the card back in front of A, squaring it) He filed this in my box, over my mom's tune. (beat) Tomorrow he says where he learned the words — or no dessert.
Chandler
Source(dragging a chair around, sitting backward) Phoebs, I came here to be furniture, and now the guy's redecorating. (beat) Fine. Wednesday my mug went missing — "Chan" in my own printing, chip on the rim — and I've been drinking out of Joe's ever since. (beat) If he's collecting one thing from each of us, I'd like to know what he does with the set.
Rachel
Source(taking the candle, planting it dead center between the bowls) So tomorrow I'm the ambience, and Joe's the appetite. (beat) Fine — if that song's about me, the muffin comes out of his tip.
Joey
Source(slow, thinking hard) Tuesday I was holding my sub. Then I was holding the door. Then — no sub. (beat) I figured I ate it. What if I didn't?
Chandler
Source(crossing to the register, checking the shelf underneath, then shutting it) Rach, if that song's about you, it goes in the greatest-hits file and never comes out again. (beat) And my mug says "Chan" in big crooked letters — so tomorrow, if a stranger walks in holding me, everybody in this room will spot him before I do.
Ross
Source(sliding the two-fourteen card out of his breast pocket, laying it under the counter lamp) What am I hiding? This. Evidence goes in the tin, and I've been carrying it in my coat like a subpoena. (beat) Phoebs, he didn't steal from me — he copied me. "Before A" is my rule, and I only say it in this room. (beat) So tomorrow he answers before he eats: what has he filed us under?
Chandler
Source(dropping into a chair, then pointing slowly around the table) Hold on. The hand, the tune, the menu names, your before-A rule — everything he's got is something we only do in this room. (beat) So he's not a fan. He's been sitting here with us, and we've been putting on the show for free. (beat) Tomorrow, nobody performs. Let's see what he brought of his own.
Phoebe
Source(stopping mid-chord, squinting at the ceiling) Wait. Beige coat, little notebook — he came to my subway gig three nights. (beat) Never clapped, never tipped, just wrote. I thought he was a critic.
Joey
Source(throwing his hands up) Great, tomorrow I'm just a guy at a table. (beat) I've never played a guy at a table. I need three weeks.
Monica
Source(arms crossed, looking around the room) So he's got Rach's menu, Phoebs's hand, my mom's tune, Chan's mug — and I get nothing? (beat) Fine. Tomorrow he gets my soup, and it's the only copy.
Rachel
Source(tying her apron back on) Joe, you've been a guy at a table since 1994. (beat) And Chan's right — tomorrow I'm on shift, so he orders out loud like a person, or he gets nothing.
Chandler
Source(clapping Joey on the shoulder) Joe, it's the easiest part you'll ever get — sit at a table and don't perform. (beat) Phoebs, your guy writes everything down, so tomorrow we ask for the notebook. He can keep the mug; he is not my biographer.
Joey
Source(pointing at her, wounded) That's called range, Rach. (beat) Tomorrow I'm a guy at a table with no soup. That's a tragedy.
Ross
Source(flipping the card over, pen out) Wrap-up cue — S01/E14 closes on the counter lamp. One last line each about tomorrow, then we lock up and leave the light on. (beat) Two-fourteen. One plate. Nobody performs.
Rachel
Source(flipping the counter lamp off, then back on) Two-fourteen, one plate, and I'm the only one of us getting paid to be there. (beat) So somebody bring me a muffin — I'm not performing either.
Chandler
Source(one hand flat on the light switch, leaving it on) Tomorrow: two-fourteen, one plate, and a stranger wearing my name. (beat) I want the mug back — it's the only thing in my apartment that's sure who I am.
Joey
Source(patting the counter lamp, then holding the empty breadstick plate up) So tomorrow: light on, two-fourteen, one plate. (beat) Rach gets her muffin, I get my sandwich back, and nobody's a critic.
Monica
Source(locking the back door, then leaving the counter lamp on) Light stays on — my mom never fed anybody in the dark. (beat) Two-fourteen, one plate. He brings the words, I bring the soup.
Phoebe
Source(slipping the four-line song into her guitar case, then zipping it shut) Tomorrow I sing one he can't write down — no words, just the hand part. (beat) And if he claps, he pays.